THE BALDIE MOVEMENT

     A couple of weeks ago, Nell, the gorgeous founder of the Baldie Movement asked me of I would like to do an interview for the Baldie movement. I told her it would be such an honor and in no time emails were exchanged,  and boom interview.  Baldie Movement is devoted to empowering bald women from all walks of life to love themselves more without the need of hair through education, monthly meet ups, and self esteem building workshops. The mission is bring together women who are bald by choice or circumstance to support and empower our community of women battling with hair loss. The B.A.L.D.I.E is an acronym  for Beauty and Love Demonstrated In Everything. Who would not want to be a part of that? 

Please check out the interview she did on me here

DOUBT

"You have been assigned this mountain to show others that it can be moved." Unknown

The other day I got started on a project then a little voice at the back of my head started asking questions. The more I started paying attention to it the louder the voice became. When I decided to focus and pay attention to what I was doing, the little voice would fade away. The more I would immerse myself into the project, the voice faded away like the mist of breath on a mirror. 

I have often asked myself why I always succumbed to this little voice especially when whatever I am working on is not sub par. Looking back from some decisions I had made in the past in regards to anything I would be working on, this little voice had been a deciding factor. I would not call it the voice of reason, I think of the voice of reason as calm, collected, poised and with a soft understanding smile.  This other voice was an annoying screeching voice which often got to me, resulting to me throwing away my art work, or a top I had made in the trash in the trash!  It's the voice that wants everything to be perfect but here's the thing, nothing ever is perfect. I can vividly remember the frustration I feel after throwing my work in the garbage. Those were painful moments, like breaking up with someone you had invested in. Someone you had hopes and dreams about but sadly,  they fell short not because it was their fault, but yours. 

I pray often. It keeps me calm. This gift that I have been given is mines to share. This journey of creativity and self - discovery is wrought with many doubts. It's part and parcel of the creation process. The questions are a constant roller coaster in my head. Will this work? Is this work that I will be proud of? Will this inspire someone? What am I learning? What are you doing? This is crap? This is amazing!! Sometimes I do wonder why I do this in the first place. Then I have to remember the why. The why helps me put things in perspective. The only thing that kills any creative endeavor is self - doubt. Therefore, in as much I struggle with it, I have to forge on because it's in the process of creating and putting in the work that I discover myself. That screeching squeeky voice be damned!!

SENSITIVE

I used to dislike being sensitive.

I thought it made me weak. But take away that single trait and you take away the very essence of who I am. You take away my conscience, my ability to empathize, my intuition, my creativity, my deep appreciation for little things, my inner life and passion for it all.

Beautiful words from an unknown writer. Those words resonated so deeply with me.  I at times wanted to make myself exude that tough exterior, but facades can only last for so long right?

I have learnt to embrace this deep feeling, this connection, this deep appreciation, that is such a part of me taking it away would like trying to remove somethings that's deeply ingrained in my DNA.

MOMENTS 2015

WOW!!! This year has gone by faster than my teens. It has been a challenging yet remarkable year altogether. There were moments when I wanted to give up, some that made me cry, some that made my laugh out loud and moments that made me realize I am much stronger than I thought. So without further do, let's jump straight into it.

NEW YORK

I am typing this in my little apartment in New York! Unbelievable!! I had been meaning to make this move forever! Ever since I was a young girl and discovered how fashion and clothes play an important role in my life, I knew New York was the place for me. The first time I visited this city back in 2008, I knew without a doubt that this was IT!! Gosh, I still get goosebumps! New York is beautiful, daunting, and definitely not your mother. I have learnt so much the few months that I have been here than this whole year put together. Getting here is just the beginning. It's a goal I have accomplished. Putting in work is what comes in next. It will not be easy but I believe the first hurdle is done. Now it's time to layout the foundation.

PEOPLE

Many people will come into your life. Some will be there for a season, others will be there for commercial breaks, others will be there only when the glasses are being raised up in toasts, while others will stay forever. Life is a journey and not everyone will be with you in the long run. As the people shuffle in and out in your life, you will discover a few things about yourself, and about life too. We are all different, the most important thing is to DO YOU! Do what makes you happy, do that thing that excites and scares you at the same damn time because at the end of the day, the only one in charge of your life is you. You should be in touch with your inner star play at all times. For the people who are with you on this journey called life, treasure them, learn from them and be grateful to have them in your life. They are your team, they will cry with you when times are tough and remind you it's not the end of the road. They know your weakness but show you your strengths. They will push you to greatness because they believe in you. They will challenge you, they will drive you crazy at times, but they will always be there when you need them. It won't be about who you knew the longest but who walked into your life and said "I am here for you!" and proved it.  

BROKEN RIBS

This was the post popular post this year. It was not on  a new outfit post, or my fitness regimen but on death and loss.  I found that this post resonated with a lot of people because my emotions were deep and raw.. My eyes still well up when I read it. We go  through life thinking that the last time won't be the last time. We think we have forever, but we don't. So live your best life now do what makes you happy. Don't forget to love. Love the people around you, love what you do, love everyday that you get to wake up and see a new day.

MY FAVORITE READ THIS YEAR

One of my favorite reads this year was Mitch Albom's Tuesday's with Morrie. I loved it so much I think I might read it again. I have recommended it to everyone I know. There were gems scattered all over the book. Add it to your booklist. It's a quick read but the wisdom in it is beyond. One of the many favorite quotes I have highlighted from this book goes like this.

"So many people walk around a meaning less life. They seem half-asleep, even when they are busy doing things they think are important. This is because they are chasing the wrong things. The way you get meaning into your life is to devoting yourself to loving others, devote yourself to the community around you, and devote yourself into doing something that gives you purpose or meaning."

Get this book!!

THE BLOG AND YOU

Thank you, Thank you!!!! I wouldn't be doing this if it was not for you. Anneconventional is what it is because of you.  You who has clicked a link from twitter or Facebook to find out what I am talking about. Whether it's on my latest outfit post or my little musings on life! I appreciate you all. Thank you so much!!!! With every post I share, I learn so much more about the fabulous world of fashion and myself as well.  I went on a little black out mid this year. I had decided to change my blog layout as this year started which resulted to using WordPress. I did not like the results and the new site looked blah and had major hangups that at times drove me crazy! I even wondered why I did it in the first place. I was uninspired and unenthusiastic. Even my big bro Dybby mentioned that there was a long period where I just didn't post. I told him I had to take a mini break. Doing that made me neglect my blog and be indifferent. Here's the thing about the things you are passionate about. They won't let you get a good nights sleep. You will think about it over and over again. I pondered on how I would restore the site back, tossed and turned on many endless nights. I decided I would go back to my original platform (Squarespace) and create a site that would make me happy. So here we are, a revamped site that is simple and clean with easy navigation. Thanks for the wonderful comments on how beautiful the new layout looks. I truly appreciate it! Keep on subscribing and sharing. 2016 will be a fabulous year.

So as I don the quirky 2016 hat and sunglasses. I am raising my glasses to you and yours!!

WISHING YOU ALL A HAPPY HAPPY NEW YEAR AND A VERY PROSPEROUS 2016!!

CHEERS!!!!

 Thanks you once again for continuous support!! :)

HITTING THE SLOPES

     Early this year, late February to be exact, I decided to join my brother Dybby and his daughter Lisa (my lovely niece)for skiing.The last time I hit the white slopes was three years ago. To be a good skier, you have to ski often, as with all  sports. It’s all about the practise. You do it so often it becomes second to nature. I was worried my legs couldn't handle it. Dumb right? I had two good legs but the voice in my head was just dishing out all the worst things that could happen. I could fall and crack my skull regardless of the helmet or not. Perhaps I would break a femur, be in crutches for months, limping and hopping about. Worse, I could hit my head, get in a coma, I hadn't gotten to the business of writing a will. What if I became brain dead? Would someone have to pull the plug. Holy cow, as you can see I was going off on a tangent and watched too many seasons of Gray’s Anatomy. I sat quietly there trying to slow down my over active imagination which was now on horsepower mode by reading a book. Wrong thing to do! Words like fall, leap, crack, head, injury, dead, leaped out in Bold size 36 font. I slammed the book shut and called my brother with some flimsy excuse. My brother is a guy who has contingencies for everything. He has plan A and B down and if C doesn't work the other letters of the alphabet are there for him to work with. Nothing fazes him. So I dish out my flimsy ass excuse that is somewhat similar to the one Kevin Hart dishes out on his stand up. On how the savings and the checking are linked and it takes three days to... bla bla bla and he quietly ponders on it then says that's not an issue. Money shouldn't be an issue. I can always refund him back. I sit there chewing my lip wondering how to get off this trip.

      Shucks! I was off work, I had precisely kept the day open for this ski session with my bro and niece, sort of a bonding session and here I was trying to bail out. Then he said something that later bothered me. He said it's up to me if I wanted to join the ski trip, then he reminded me I had done this last year. You know, the bailing out last minute thing. I honestly didn't  remember about the previous year. I must have had a hot date or something, my brain is not the foggy kind but I do remember something "important" had come  up.

Oh well, I have never been known to be a quitter. So I texted my brother told him I would see him on Saturday. Bring on those damn ski's, I got this! I told myself.

What's the worst that could happen?

     Saturday morning, I was all suited up in my ski pants, warm gloves, beanie, my red North Face jacket. I was armored against the cold. I found my brother packing our lunch and I had brought some snacks as well. Twenty minutes later, we were on our way to the Liberty Ski Resort.

       Liberty resort is a good two and a half hours away. I distracted myself by gazing outside as the trees and houses passed, chatting with my brother, asking Lisa about school and some other random small talk. Inside my head, no small talk was going on. It was a full blown pandemonium, a ruckus that got my poor heart racing like I had just finished a 100 M dash. I took small steady breaths to calm myself, a trick I had learnt during my high school performance days. Nerves can be a tricky thing.

            As we arrived at the resort, you could feel the excitement and thrill of the other skiers and snowboarders. It was palpable. It felt like everyone and their mothers were there. Kids of all ages suited up looking like mini tele-tubbies, tagging along their parents. The snowboarders hoisting up their boards chatting aimlessly marching towards the slopes. A group of teenagers in skittle colored pants and jackets, and fancy reflecting sunk sunglasses on their helmets were in a deep discussion probably about the walking dead or snapchat or whatever teens talk about nowadays. Signs all over the place to aid this happy ski ready mob to whatever destination they required.

     We joined the que, registered, signed up and signed away our lives. The damn fine print be damned. We then attached the lift pass tickets on our pants and jackets respectively. The ticket allows you to use the lifts in the ski area. I was still thinking I could still get out of this. My niece who was beyond eager to get this party started was ten seconds short of tapping her toes. There was no way I was going to balk in front of my brother with my lovely niece looking up to me. Nope. We got on our Ski boots which I should say they weigh a ton. They are as heavy as five bricks. Then picture strapping them on your feet and having to walk towards the slopes with your skiis, ski poles, and full regalia. It is a waddle of some sort, like a pig that ate too much.

             We grabbed our ski's and helmet and joined the rest world out on the slopes. That's when I stared panicking. My hurt started beating, and I saw myself being rushed to the ER. My brother was putting on his headphones while my niece was getting to join the snowboarders. I was rooted to the ground as if a first grader on her  first day at school. My brother looked up and noticed the uncertainty on my face. He asked if I was ok.

I gulped and told him that I was nervous and a little bit afraid. Then he said  you have done this before, it won't be too bad. Just remember the basics.

     What I was about to embark on was Alpine skiing which is common in most Ski resorts. It's going down slope. The basics involved making the pie with your ski's, a nice acute angle now and then when skiing. The skii tips should be slightly kissing each other or just about to. If your skiis are parallel to each other, bend your knees and let gravity take care of the rest. If you need to slow down, create the pie. The pie was your brakes pretty much. The heel and toe of a ski boot should be firmly secured to a ski. In a nutshell my friends, that is skiing 101. The rest you learn as you go. On the slopes!

My brother hit the que to get to the swing chairs that would get him up the slopes. My niece was off to the opposite direction for a snow boarding session. Then there I was, standing on slushy ice crystals holding my skis, rocking heavy, uncomfortable shoes, in bloody cold weather!

It was now or never.

        I got my music playlist ready, put on my headphones and marched towards the slopes. I put my skiis down, stepped on the ski's until my boots clicked on them. I felt so uncertain at first, like I was going to fall but I defied gravity. My helmet and fancy ski sunglasses were already on. Dybby had already had first moment on the slopes and was ready for his second round. I was lazing around enjoying the tunes while I tried to pass time acting like I was doing an important task. He found me shuffling like an old lady with my skiis. Awkward and uncoordinated.

    Nevertheless, I lined up on the lift pass, sat on the swing chair ready to tackle what seemed like a mini-hill. It would serve as my warm-up. I won't lie, I was frightened, I hadn't done this in eons but I let my music soothe me into calmness. I was sitting quietly with other two ladies on the lift chair watching the lift go up, while the skiers below looked like tiny ants.

This mini-hill was slowly turning into Mt.Everest!  As we were getting closer to the top the now Mt Everest, the lady at the end of our chair looked at us and asked if we were ready. I remember giving her that fake smile that doesn't reach the eyes. A hesitant smile. A smile that did a poor job at smearing the trepidation off my face. If she would have looked deep into my eyes, the eyes would have told her so. But she didnt, she was getting ready to  slide off the chair holding onto her poles.

Getting of the ski lift chairs requires immaculate execution. All three occupants have to get off at the same time without tangling each other's skis or boards. A little mishap can cause everyone to tumble down on the snow, compelling the ski lift operator to pause the lift so that everyone is back on their feet and the world is safe again. You might endure  unfriendly side-eyes if you caused the mishap. My main goal was to ensure that I didnt  fall as we got ready to get off the chair. Or tumble  down the snow, period! I had endured that stage with some forbearance and at times, utter mortification during my initial ski lessons years ago. I told myself if I could accomplish that, then am sure the rest would go smoothly. I believe in domino effects, ok?

The lift got us off, and I slid down gracefully and made a stop. My partners looked A-okay too. Great, the first hurdle was over. I smiled at them, fixed my gloves, adjusted my headphones then checked to make sure my ski sunglasses were positioned correctly on my helmet and stable on my nose bridge. Any reservations I had earlier had completely disappeared.

I was ready to hit the slopes. Bring it on you bad boy!

          I secured a spot and used my poles to drive me forward, and down the slope I went. Boy oh boy! The rush that I had was beyond amazing. My skiis felt as if they were bouncing softly in the white powder. I watched the panoramic views all around me as I carved my skiis on the slopes. The views were spectacular from the top. My adrenaline was rushing, my heart was racing and I could feel the chill of the wind on my face as I sped down the mountain. I was skiing and gracefully at that.  I made neat small curves which I would watch with pride. Those curvy imprints in the snow made me feel like I was leaving all my doubts, worries, and cares behind with every foot of the mountain I had conquered. I felt belting out the eye of the tiger! As I got closer to the bottom of the mountain, I remembered the pie, and veered off slowing down and came to a stop. I had done it!  I turned back and looked at the slopes, then burst out into a smile. No a grin. I felt like laughing. I believe I did. I adjusted my gloves once again, the warm-up was done, I skied back to the lines by the lift chairs. By the end of that day I had tackled  insane slopes that made you feel like toppling over by just looking at them. And, I didnt fall!

     Here in lovely New York City, the cold wind is already in our midst, and summer is now an afterthought. I felt it straight through my bones this past weekend. It made me tear up, not because it moved me in any emotional way but at how cold it was. So cold it had me sniffling and tearing up as if I was watching the Notebook. Today’s post is not about the weather or the slopes or how to ski 101. It’s about tackling our fears. That thing that stops us from being great or discovering your potential. There comes a time where you will need to tackle your worst fears. Fears buried so deep that they seem to weigh you down, make you immobile. The truth about these fears, most of the time, are a result of your imagination. As humans we have an high inclination to focus on the negative. Give someone a compliment a thousand times, yeah, yeah! Critic them once, they remember it for a lifetime. That is why I think fear is the main reason why alot of thing’s don't get done. Fear of the unknown, fear of change, fear of new experiences, fear of being wrong, fear of being fearful, fear of... the list is endless. I remember the fear that almost choked me up going up those slopes. The time I created all sort of scenarios. I was building walls which would only confine me in. If I had listened to the voice in my head, I would be seated in the cozy resort reading a book while watching the skiers go down the slopes smiling and high-fiving each other. I would have missed out on the experience. The chance to immerse myself into the unknown and learn something totally new. 

    The same thoughts are in my mind at the moment. New city, new friends, new roommates, new workmates, new lifestyle… Everything is new.I feel like I am starting all over again. It is  little bit nerve-wracking and daunting at times but I remind myself that the days I am most uncomfortable are the days I learn most about myself. About what I am capable of. This my dear friend, is quite a revelation. When the lady on the lift chair asked us if we were ready I did not know it would be a question that I would hear over and over again. Are you ready? I got asked this question so much months or even weeks before I moved to New York City. A rhetorical question because the truth is you will never be ready. I think being ready is like waiting for the perfect moment, the perfect weather or the perfect scenarios. If you keep waiting, you will let opportunities pass you by. You can only grow if you’ feel awkward and uncomfortable when you try something new. Plunge into whatever you think you can not do. Fear be damned! Seize the day. You will come out of that experience, exhilarated, pumped, super happy wondering why you never did it in the first place. So whenever you find yourself doubting how far you can go, just remember how far you have come. Remember everything you have faced, all the battles you've won and all the fears you have overcome. Go tackle your own slopes, do not be afraid to fall that is how you learn in the beginning, and don't forget to enjoy the ride. It’s exhilarating!

Thanks for stopping by.